The Truth About Girl Code

By: Hanifah Jones

Edited: Esthefany Castillo


Girl Code is much more than a popular MTV series or the title of a City Girls album. Since the beginning of time, girl code has provided us with a set of ethics and guide to navigating our relationships with each other. Many people think girl code is all about not dating your friend’s ex, but there’s so much more to it. Girl code is about empowering and supporting your friends. I consulted a few of my friends and we came up with a list of what girl code means to us.

1. Remember the buddy system

We’ve all been there, a fun girls night out quickly turns sour after a friend has had a few drinks too many. Even if she’s doing the most, don’t leave her alone. Being alone as a woman makes you vulnerable, and when alcohol is added to the equation things can become extremely dangerous. Always keep an eye on your friends when alcohol or drugs are involved. Yes, you want to have fun, and you should, but remember that your safety and that of your friends’ are always a priority.

2. Have your girls' back

Take it from me, a little support can go a long way! If your friend has a business or a project that they’re passionate about, be sure to show your support. It’s important to remember that your friend is a businesswoman and may not be able to offer freebies or discounts; it’s also unfair to expect that. If you can’t afford to support their business financially, even a simple social media shoutout will mean the world to them. Buy that skincare, listen to that podcast, or share your friend’s bake sale flyer!

3. Be a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear

Whether it’s a bad breakup or the downfalls of adulting, sometimes your girl needs to vent. Be there for her to the best of your ability. We are all busy adults, so it might not always be possible to meet her at her place with a pint of ice cream. By sending a quick text to make sure she’s okay you will let her know that you care, and that’s all that matters.

4. Talk things out after an argument

There will be times when you get on each other’s nerves and disagree -- that’s normal. Disagreements happen, just don’t keep things bottled up. Whether it’s a minor disagreement or a full out argument, address it with your friend, not other people who have nothing to do with it. Addressing things head-on will allow you to voice your frustrations, avoid drama, and find a solution.

5. Never stand by while someone is talking trash about your friend

If you’re my friend, no one should feel comfortable gossiping about me in your presence. How you stick up for your friends in their absence says a lot about the strength of your friendship. Whether it’s a rumor or a snarky comment about your friend’s outfit, shut it down.

6. Show love

Let your gal pals know that you appreciate them. It’s important to remember that platonic friendships are still relationships. I enjoy “friend dates” like brunch, girls’ nights, and even hanging out and watching corny rom-coms. Every friendship has its individual love language. Maybe you show love to your friend by sharing memes or music, whatever it is, make sure you find a way to let your friends know that you value their place in your life.

7. Uplift each other

In a world of sexism and a glass ceiling and just won’t shatter, we have to be happy for other women and their accomplishments. Take the recent US Open match between Naomi Osaka and Coco Gauff as an example. As Naomi accepted her win from the game, Coco was visibly distraught. Instead of gloating, Naomi showed her compassion by consoling her and inviting her to a post-game interview.

*Honorable Mentions*

Always keep an extra pad or tampon with you just in case

Be sure to get your girl’s angles right if she asks you to take a picture

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