By previous writer Patricia Rodriguez
If there’s anything that I have learned from my 22 years on this Earth, it’s that feelings are not facts.
In life, we often spend time thinking about the things we should have done, or regretting situations that we probably shouldn’t have put ourselves into. We worry, stress, and trigger ourselves to the point of maybe even an anxiety attack, and all for what really?
Our need to avoid the current state of our emotions perpetuates a cycle of this maladaptive behavior that just simply drives us locas.
Feelings often blur how we look at facts. It doesn’t matter how much we wish we could have handled things differently, or how embarrassed we are over a situation, these things are not going to change the facts of what happened.
If it were as easy as wishing thoughts away once they become overbearing, we would be blessed with eternal bliss, but life does not work that way. Your feelings are valid, however, they won’t ever change the things that are out of your control.
“The Art of Letting Go” is what I call allowing the world to treat you the way it chooses so that you can stop focusing on the wrong things—the ones you can’t change.
Letting go means no more failed expectations and repeated disappointments. It allows you to set yourself free from the “victim narrative,” which although comforting, will always leave you unhappy. The art of letting go is essentially the art of non-attachment.
Once you fully let go, you will finally accept things as they are. You will focus on the present and you will be content with the decisions and circumstances that brought you where you are today.
And lastly, you will be more forgiving with yourself. If you know you have a good heart, the art of letting go will release you from the self-blame that can be stifling.
Ladies, raise your hand if you’ve spent most of the time driving yourself crazy thinking and analyzing a situation over and over again? I too suffer from this “illness,” but, I am proud to say that I am making strides to recover from this horrible habit.
So, if letting go would be something that you would like to achieve, here are some things to remember:
Breathe and keep it real.
As peachy as we would love for life to be, it will always give us some adversity and challenges to overcome. From breakups, to losing a job, or not being able to decide what we want to do with our lives, all these events come with feelings that can seem suffocating.
Breathe when things get hard—literally, stop and take some deep breaths. Then go find solutions instead of mulling over issues that you have no authority over. Let it go.
Thinking about all the good times you had with your ex, or about how losing your job will cause financial hardships in the upcoming weeks will not change the fact that you and your man broke up or that you now have no income. Stressing or holding onto things will only stop you from using your energy in an efficient way.
Prioritize your time wisely.
You know how many times it has been midterms season and I have allowed my personal life and emotions get in the way of obtaining my deserved A’s? Trust me, more times that I would even like to admit.
Do not allow overthinking or your feelings to stop you from getting your business handled. Life may seem difficult at times, and trust, by not letting go, you’re only making it harder. So love yourself a little, and let that shit go by finding a healthy balance and putting your goals first.
Believe in the universe.
Believe that the universe has your back and will not do you wrong. Have faith that you are exactly where you are meant to be, and everything that has occurred up to his point happened for a reason.
Believe that the universe works for you rather against you. Trust that no matter what turmoil that you’re experiencing, the universe has better days coming your way. Once you build that trust with the universe, you will stop focusing on stupid things, because you will know that everything will straighten itself out like it always does.
Do Not Set Expectations
That’s right! No more expectations, please! If your best friend wants to take out her anger out on you and treat you badly, or if after a year, you’re still unable to break into the industry of your dreams, keep in mind that these are all events affect you, however, they do not define you. You have no control over the way things pan out, so it’s okay to have goals, but do not bear the weight of expectations.
In an ideal world, the energy that you put out would be reciprocated and matched with the same, but that’s not always the case. Do not allow idealized expectations to cause more pain than they have to or to take away from the beauty that life can bring.
Life will always ask you to adapt to new challenges and you’ll never be able to succeed unless you let the small stuff go.
How do you let stuff go? Or do you have trouble with it? Share in the comments below!